Girlfriend or More? :A BLOG about me! : with a hint of poetry.

Girlfriend... or more?
And as a poet I find myself in an awkward position.
In the center of a love torus.
Wondering if love is really meant for us...
                          all.
Or if at all...
                      Love is really reality
 - or just a brain chemical reacting
 to what we think we feel... "Is it real?" 



But this poet has touched lust
                                          - calling it love, 
                                                                    ....trading it for compassion
so for me... 
to love so freely,
doesn't appeal to me...
    I simply lack the motivation.
for there has never been a situation
where love has left me anything...
                                                        but wounded.  
And I thought I could do it.
I thought I might find love  w a i t i n g  for me
because... one day I had an epiphany, 
but what seemed to be,
to me, 
was not.
           anything... really. 
and I lack the inspiration to pry again,
and there's really no reason to try again...
because I know
with her
             in the end:
I get   n  o  w  h  e  r  e.
And since I tend to go where
I'm wanted
I look elsewhere.
and my mom used to always say,
"Life's not fair but God is just."
And I figure He must 
be-
because so many times He's saved me
and He's kept me company.
and He never leaves me lonely.
So I rejoice when I am alone,
because I know...
soon, someone will come knocking
and my walls are down so there won't be anyone here
to stop 'em
so if she moves swiftly enough 
and if she's tender and tough
and if she's got her wits up
she might just
slip inside my heart
and shut the door. 
                  (but no one's ever done that before)
because I easily bore
but if she manages to intrigue me
if she doesn't try to deceive me but 
loves me honestly. 
Then I just might be hers to keep.
You see I'm a RoManTiC, hopelessly.
And I want to fall in love, for eternity
and I believe
                                                   "I do." 
means, "I'll never leave."
and... if you hold my hand while you promise me
just know that every morning I pledge to live honestly
and with integrity.
Knowing that i will raise my children to stand firm in their convictions
and to Love without restrictions...
or limitations.
Teaching them to be honest and have patience.
Teaching not with my words, but with my actions.
So that our next generation
will be people of action. 
but before I do all that....
I need a girlfriend.
and they always seem to find you when your not lookin' 
so I'll stop,
close my eyes 
and say,
"Surprise me baby. You don't have to call me when your coming, just knock."
R. Calloway :metamorpho:




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Comments

Anonymous said…
This was a really deep poem. Thanks for sharing it with me. xoxo <3 Artist
dala said…
wow!
this was really nice to read i wish i could have heard u reading it but i enjoyed dis boo good luck on the search and i wish i could be this 4 u but i dnt go 1 ur school and i love to club and online is a lil creepy :)

ttyl
dala
Nicole said…
You make me wanna switch campuses :-)
I been looking for a battle buddy but keep getting disappointed, is it really so hard for someone to be there or is that just selfishness? so maybe I need a GF...hmmmmm??
I love how you get me thinking with your thoughts/blogs/TRUTH.
lot$ said…
this made me want a gf too lol i havent wanted one in a while! thanx for the motivation lol
thanks everyone :)

@nicole, no that's not selfish, you just know what you want... in time it will come :) Just be patient, God will send you someone to love.
Anonymous said…
i been wanting that to you never know were you will meet her maybe in a library or at a jazz club sitting at the beach who knows but true love you dont have to search hard for just doing the things that make you happy should catch their attention.
Nicole said…
I will be @ the beach, park, jazz and poetry clubs, and my other special places NOT LOOKING (I like that idea)
this made me smile, ear to ear... i wanted to write something else but i feel it may be taken incorrectly, or seem somewhat inappropriate...
Yasmin said…
wanting love...waiting for love...who finds love....hmmmm real love awaits and if its anything like how you describe it ill wait forever...<3

sn:nice
Stephanie said…
I enjoyed reading; and its nice to see im not the only person that wants to be faithful and have a family :D